When parents separate, it is normal to experience conflict or uncertainty about how arrangements will work in practice. If your ex repeatedly ignores, changes, or refuses to follow agreed parenting arrangements, it can cause stress, confusion, and disruption for your children.
What you can do next depends on what type of agreement you have, whether it is legally enforceable, and whether the other parent has a reasonable excuse.
This guide explains your options under Australian family law and when it is time to seek legal advice.
What Type of Parenting Arrangement Do You Have?
Your rights (and the steps you can take) depend on whether the arrangement is:
- An informal agreement or parenting plan (not legally enforceable), or
- Parenting orders (legally enforceable by the Court).
1. Informal Agreements or Parenting Plans
Informal agreements and parenting plans are not legally enforceable. If the other parent refuses to follow them, the law requires you to follow the usual dispute-resolution steps by attending Family Dispute Resolution with a registered Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner, unless an exemption applies.
If participation in FDRP still does not resolve the dispute, you may need to apply to the Court for parenting orders.
2. Parenting Orders (Including Consent Orders)
Parenting orders are legally binding, and both parents must take all reasonable steps to comply.A parent contravenes (breaches) a parenting order if they:
- Intentionally fail to comply
- Make no reasonable attempt to comply
The Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia confirms these obligations and the requirement to positively encourage children to follow orders.
What Should You Do If Your Ex Breaches Parenting Arrangements?
Step 1. Try Family Dispute Resolution
Before going to Court, most people must attend FDR. This is compulsory unless you qualify for an exemption, such as family violence, child abuse, or urgency. If you reach an agreement, you may:
- Create a new parenting plan, or
- Apply for updated consent orders.
Step 2. Keep Following the Existing Orders
Even if your ex is not complying, you must continue following your obligations unless the Orders are varied by the Court.
Step 3. Consider a Contravention Application
If FDR fails (or you are exempt), you can make a Contravention Application to the Court.
A contravention application asks the Court to determine whether:
- The breach occurred,
- There was a reasonable excuse, and
- What consequences should follow
According to the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia, the Court may order:
- Make-up time for the parent who missed time with the child
- Mandatory attendance at a post-separation parenting program
- Compensation for lost expenses
- A bond
- Fines
- Community service
- Imprisonment in the most serious cases
What Counts as a “Reasonable Excuse”?
The Court may excuse a breach if:
- The parent did not understand the order, and the Court accepts this was reasonable; or
- The parent believed the breach was necessary to protect the health and safety of themselves or the child, and the breach did not last longer than necessary.
Disagreements, anger, inconvenience, or new partners do not qualify as reasonable excuses.
What If the Other Parent Will Not Let Me See My Child?
If the parent is withholding the child and you have orders, you may be able to apply for:
- A recovery order (to have the child safely returned), or
- A location order if the other parent’s whereabouts are unknown.
These orders are urgent and should be considered with legal advice.
What If the Current Orders No Longer Work?
If circumstances have genuinely changed, you may need to seek:
A variation of the existing orders, which can be agreed upon between the parties and documented by way of updating consent orders, or by way of an Application to the Court if there is no agreement.
When to Get Legal Advice
Seek advice from a family lawyer if:
- Your ex repeatedly breaches arrangements
- There are safety concerns
- Your child is being withheld
- Mediation or FDR has failed
- You need to vary existing orders
An experienced, reputable lawyer can help you:
- Assess whether there has been a legal breach
- Respond to allegations made against you
- Prepare a contravention or recovery order application
- Negotiate updates to your parenting arrangements
- Protect your rights and the well-being of your children
Read: Do You Still Have To Pay Child Support After 18 in Australia?
Family Law Support Across Sydney
At O’Sullivan Legal, we help parents across Australia resolve parenting disputes and enforce parenting arrangements respectfully, quickly, and in the best interests of their children.
We provide guidance on:
- Enforcing parenting orders
- Responding to contravention allegations
- Parenting plans and agreements
- FDR and Mediation
- Recovery and location orders
- Varying existing orders
Learn more about our legal services in parenting arrangements and parenting orders or make an online enquiry.
About Ben O’Sullivan, Director
Ben O’Sullivan is an experienced family lawyer and the Director of O’Sullivan Legal. He holds a Master of Applied Family Law.
Ben has represented parents in complex parenting matters, which involve contraventions, recovery orders, family violence issues, and high-conflict parenting disputes. His strong commercial and legal background enables him to analyse issues carefully while remaining empathetic and solution focused.
Ben is also trained in collaborative law and works to help families resolve disputes quickly, safely, and cost-effectively wherever possible.
Whether you need family lawyers for your Parramatta, Gold Coast, Melbourne, Northern Beaches, or a trustworthy child custody lawyer in Sydney, Ben is committed to excellence.
Enforce Parenting Arrangements: Talk to Our Family Lawyers in Sydney
If your ex will not follow your parenting arrangements, O’Sullivan Legal can help you understand your rights and take the next steps. We take pride in being family lawyers who help Sydney families find a solution. Here are our locations:
- Level 2, Suite 2.03, 491 Kent Street, Sydney NSW 2000
- Level 27, 101 Collins Street, Melbourne VIC 3000Telephone: 03 9221 6344
- Level 14, 3 Parramatta Square, 153 Macquarie Street, Parramatta NSW 2150Telephone: 02 8114 4511
Contact us by calling (02) 8114 4511 or emailing to arrange a confidential consultation. We make things easy, efficient, and worry-free.